Tis the Season for Some Stress.
Want to open your own Christmas tree lot?
It's a lot harder than it looks. Here is part of what you're in for:
First you Need a Vacant Lot: This is fairly easy your first year. Just rent one on a busy street. But if you want to continue year after year, and build your clientele, you are vulnerable to the forces of the market. If you are unlucky enough to get a really good lot, chances are it will be developed soon and you will need to relocate.
Prepare the Parking Lot: If you're like Johnson, you won't want your customers parking in a muddy field, so bring in 175 tons of gravel. Don't forget signs for handicapped parking spots.
Fence in the Tree Lot: You'd be a fool not to, so get a couple hundred feet of chain-link fence and install it - easy. If your lot is in Irvine, California, you'll have to post exit signs on all the gates (in case of earthquake) and fire extinguishers.
Light it Up: Most of your sales will be at night, so string a few hundred light bulbs overhead. You'll probably need a generator to power all this - Johnson rents a generator the size of a Ford Explorer and it costs him several hundred dollars just to fill it with deisel fuel each week.
Play Christmas Carols: Use a CD changer, and buy a dozen Christmas CDs so you don't hear the same music all day. Understand that, no matter how many you buy, before you close the lot down for the season, you will jolly-well be sick of them.
Put up Signs: As many as you can.
Buy Tools: Chainsaws, drills, hammers, loppers, razor knives ("A treeman's best friend," says Johnson.) Don't get attached to this stuff, because you will destroy it. Buy plenty of twine - you don't want to run out.
Get a Merchant Account: People need to use credit cards these days.
Get the Permits: You will need permits for nearly everything, starting with; operating a business, occupying the land, collecting sales tax and applying flame retardant to trees.
Buy Tree Balers: These wrap your trees in plastic webbing - your customers love them.
Buy a Flocking Machine and Turntable: Depending on your area, this can be a very popular product. Put it inside a huge tent.
Buy the Trees: This is critical. If you buy bad trees, you will lose your shirt. If you order them to arrive at the wrong times, you'll either run out of trees during your peak weekend or you'll have a lot of brown ones. "There's a lot of stress - getting the shipments right," says Johnson. "The worst thing you can do is not have the trees here."
Get a variety - you'll need at least three types; Douglas, Noble and Fraser and you'll need them in all sizes, from three feet to ten or twelve feet. Hope you have the cash to buy at least a thousand trees, because tree farms have been burned too many times and hate to extend credit.
Hire People: Your customers need attention. You'll need two cashiers, two or three guys to stock the trees and someone to flock and treat the trees with flame retardant. Hire a dozen or so guys to sell the trees, lug them out to the parking lot and lash them onto cars. Sure, they work for tips, but you still have to pay them, and pay them well. You'll also need several guys with small trucks for deliveries.
Oh, yes - hire only honest people. Johnson hired a flocker who was selling trees (that had already been sold and had orange "sold" tags on them) right out of the flock tent. Johnson lost several thousand dollars and a few customers before he canned the guy.
Advertise: Signs, newspapers, radio, mailouts - whatever it takes. Do it now, because after December 25, there isn't an ad campaign in the world that will save you.
Pray Hard: If you have any special dance you can do to control the weather, then start dancing, because the weather can make or break you. Johnson had to put up with heavy rains which flooded his field and drove away customers, and two days of high winds, which blew over any tree he didn't tie up. If it's too cold or too hot or wet or windy, your investment and hard work can go right down the storm drain. Merry Christmas.
